The Obsidian Letters

Who Knows How Much Longer We Have?

60,096 notes

mousathe14:

ankoku37:

brianthuff:

Is there anything a natural 20 can’t do?

This is a poster idea I developed to show off the amazingness of tabletop rpgs.

image

"You attempt to pickpocket the man, but accidentally pull down his pants instead."

"You reach out to push the orc off the bridge, but instead lightly caress his back. He is uncomfortable."

"You try to stab the guard, but you stab your crotch instead. Roll fortitude."

"You say your name is Bob and not Jim. Your lie is misinterpreted and they now believe you are a serial killer."

"You swing your axe, but it slips from your fingers and sails across the room."

"In an attempt to dodge the incoming arrows, you jump into the swarm.”

"You bull rush the enemy but miss and jump off of the cliff."

"You try to land on your feet but you land on your sword instead."

"While providing first aid, your hand slips and you stab him in the heart. He dies instantly."

I CANT BREATHE

God, We’ve all been there.
My favorites include:
"Remove all your weapons!"
The Orc guards start to pat you down. As you try to conceal a dagger, your entire inventory falls out of your pouches.
"Done!"

The others are busy with the battle.
"I try to patch up my friend!"
Roll for Heal.
"No! Don’t do that!"
"One?"
You pull two handfuls of organs out of the fallen warrior.
"This looks important!"
Um. Sorry, but you go into shock and die.
"I hate you."

(via hipsterwhisperer)

233,288 notes

psychedelictrampfunk:

ashleyintransit:

danglingthpider:

m1ssc0mmun1cat10n:

floatinggoathead:

freemindfreebody:

swift-as-the-coursing-river:

jimcavill:

Because a man has to be a sociopath to love a woman with cellulite. Fuck this world. 

If all residents of hell look like Scarlett Johansson, I renounce my atheism and take up Satanism

whoever wrote this needs to be punched. a lot.

breaking news: man somehow isn’t repulsed at the sight of his beautiful, talented girlfriend because she has a bumpy texture on a bit of her legs

This just in: reporter unaware of how the female human body stores fat, having never seen one up close before.

If that’s what Hell looks like, I feel better about inevitably going there

On my way!

how dare she not have photoshop perfect everything. her legs look like nice human legs how disgusting

Come on, really? Guys?

psychedelictrampfunk:

ashleyintransit:

danglingthpider:

m1ssc0mmun1cat10n:

floatinggoathead:

freemindfreebody:

swift-as-the-coursing-river:

jimcavill:

Because a man has to be a sociopath to love a woman with cellulite. 
Fuck this world. 

If all residents of hell look like Scarlett Johansson, I renounce my atheism and take up Satanism

whoever wrote this needs to be punched. a lot.

breaking news: man somehow isn’t repulsed at the sight of his beautiful, talented girlfriend because she has a bumpy texture on a bit of her legs

This just in: reporter unaware of how the female human body stores fat, having never seen one up close before.

If that’s what Hell looks like, I feel better about inevitably going there

On my way!

how dare she not have photoshop perfect everything. her legs look like nice human legs how disgusting

Come on, really? Guys?

11,842 notes

psychedelictrampfunk:

sixpenceee:

Displayed in the Saint-Étienne church in France is the figure of René de Chalon, Prince of Orange. The prince died at the young age of 25 during the siege of Saint-Dizier in 1544. 
Rather then memorialize him in the standard hero form, his wife requested (or René himself requested, or possibly both) that he be shown as “not a standard figure but a life-size skeleton with strips of dried skin flapping over a hollow carcass, whose right hand clutches at the empty rib cage while the left hand holds high his heart in a grand gesture.” (Source)

first, let me take a selfie

psychedelictrampfunk:

sixpenceee:

Displayed in the Saint-Étienne church in France is the figure of René de Chalon, Prince of Orange. The prince died at the young age of 25 during the siege of Saint-Dizier in 1544.

Rather then memorialize him in the standard hero form, his wife requested (or René himself requested, or possibly both) that he be shown as “not a standard figure but a life-size skeleton with strips of dried skin flapping over a hollow carcass, whose right hand clutches at the empty rib cage while the left hand holds high his heart in a grand gesture.” (Source)

first, let me take a selfie

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